Oooh - what's better than flying coach? Flying coach with a television crew filming the flight attendants....

About a year ago I was on a little commuter flight between Phoenix and Bakersfield. Tiny plane, maybe eighteen rows, I ended up in the very back row by the "lavatory" and the cabin attendants' jump seat. Turns out the flight attendant sitting back in that seat (a few inches from me) was a talkative single mom that pulled me out of the David Baldacci I was finally getting a chance to read by saying "I wish my daughter had some good influences like you!"

My first thought: huh?

My second thought: I'm sure even serial killers have read a book or two.

My third thought: Great - have to make small talk.

"How old is your daughter?"

"Sixteen She's a...handful."

"Wow, you don't look old enough to have a sixteen year old!"

"Thank you! How old are you?"

I get this a lot. I look young. Sometimes looking young can also mean you look out-of-context....when buying beer, when heading into an "R-rated movie" (not kidding. they ask to see my ID), when on a date with a guy who looks his age, uh, when minding your own business on a plane reading a book? Things like that. I don't mind, I'm not so young that I can't appreciate the "you look like a high school kid" reaction. Anyway - told her I was 28. She acted shocked in return, we complimented each others' nails, made some nice "girl talk" for awhile, she alluded to the fact that she had her own "Mr Big" in Phoenix that would wine and dine her when she came through town, I wondered whether or not her daughter was a "handful" because her mom was off flying around the country getting wined and dined by suburban business guys in every city serviced by a United connector....kept that to myself.

Anyway - then I asked how long she'd been a flight attendant.

"6 months."

Oh. Hmm. So THAT'S why she's stuck in the jumpseat of a late night, mid-week commuter flight for "Mesa Airlines" on her way to Bakersfield.

"Do you enjoy it so far?"

She looked around rather "nervously" for a second, leaned in and said "Hate it. So many other catty flight attendants. You have to have seniority to get the good flights, so the women try to sabotage each other to get ahead. Last week, some b*tch told management that I left my plane dirty after the flight. My planes are always spotless. She just wanted to make me look bad so she would get the better routes. Tons of competition and backstabbing. It's awful."

Aha.

And the veil fell from my Oblivious Airline Passenger eyes and I realized that flight attendants fight office politics just like the rest of us. The additional bummer to having your coworkers try to submarine you is that you're locked in a tank with them 30,000 feet in the air and have a cabin full of demanding, ungrateful, uncomfortable passengers to content with - politely - in addition.

SO - that's the long way of getting around to the fact that the CW is debuting a show called "Fly Girls" this month that will attempt to pull the wool back over our Oblivious Airline Passenger eyes and convince us that - yes! - the life of a flight attendant IS, in fact, still a glamourous one while we follow some hot Virgin America girls around the friendly skies. They're young. They're sexy. They're getting as many business cards and dinner invitations as you think they are. They love their jobs. They love the air travel industry. The love the red carpet. Um. Yes. And I pity the fools on their flights with the cameras and the film crews and the mess that inevitably accompanies "reality" programming.

But it's actually probably a great Jersey Shore-esque way to get people excited about "enjoying the ride" between point A and B (as one Fly Girl puts it) thanks to Virgin's  "fleet-wide Wi-Fi, touchpad food and drink ordering, seat-to-seat e-chats." Given the option of Southwest or VA or Jet Blue, I have a feeling more of us would opt for the Virgin America if there's a chance we'll bump into a television personality. Why not? Flying can be a pain - add some quirky "celebrity exposure" and it might make that trip between Seattle and LA a little more fun.

The surprising bit, after reading USA Today's spotlight on the show, was that the girls involved actually didn't completely repulse me. Granted, the story was obviously edited for appeal, but the Fly Girls actually managed to sound reasonably, well....likeable. Fascinating. Apparently VA has a nominal advertising budget, so they figure this is one way to get some additional exposure. Not a bad idea, actually.....sure, we'll still get to watch the girls snip at each other, "Hills"-style behind the scenes at their LA crashpad - but fabricated conflict is the entire point of "reality" programming. And don't we all love to watch hot chicks roll their eyes at each other and pause dramatically ahead of a commercial break?

I know I do.

So, hey, how about a network puts together a show about the "underbelly of the customer support industry" and makes me the "face of the people behind the headset." I'd be down. And the entire country would watch and say, "that chick looks like she's 17."

Yep - and judging from the number of "thanks, hon!" comments I get every day, I must SOUND like I'm about 17, too.

Hey, maybe John Mayer could make a cameo.