Thursday, August 9, 2012

Champagne and picture-hanging.



Wanna know the super-secret key to successful interior decorating?

Champagne. At midnight.

Okay, prosecco, but Let's Not Be Annoying.

Bubbly. Champers. Sparkling wine. Critical to the success of midnight picture-hanging. Less critical to the success of getting up with the five am alarm a few hours later, but really: Thursday's already Friday's obnoxious, yappy dog (to use a metaphor that hits close to home), so why not dress it up with some sleep-deprived headaches and a drowsy brain, too - !

So, if I had more pictures, I'd toss them up. These ones are the official documentation that we couldn't decide whether mirror looked better Vertical. Or. Horizontal. This was a matter of grave philosophical importance. The room's chi hangs in the balance. The fancy wall bolts won't allow us to change our mind -- we must make a decision, and then STICK WITH IT. A decision about this mirror's orientation must not be taken too lightly.

Grave. Philosophical. Importance.

So, when a decision likes this proves simply too vexing for the Midnight Champagne Minds of an otherwise quite decisive couple, the obvious alternative is to abandon the mirror, and go absolutely crazy hanging every other colorful piece of art you own on your bedroom wall.

We did this last night. As though we needed to apologize to the living room wall for leaving one portion of it naked and mirror-less, we attacked the other walls with that hammer like we had something to atone for. In the end, we just proved that our bedroom walls can handle a lot more color than we gave them credit for. We're snoozing under a rainbow of blues and greens, watched over by parrot portraits and splashy, abstract gardens and "river scenes" that only look like "river scenes" because I tell myself they do: we were basically suckered into a giant, poorly painted, exceptionally colorful canvas full of horizontal lines of blue-ish green that we LOVED only because it was So Cheap! And So Big!

And so we have a wall full of Cheap and Big and Colorful art, hung (with a miraculously keen eye for Straight) at midnight.

Woke up this morning delighted. Which means we did something right.

The mirror is still waiting for its prince to come in the form of some molly bolts and a permanent place of (either horizontal OR vertical) honor on what's probably the only wall in our house that doesn't have something Large and Imposing tacked up yet.

That's tonight's project.

And the utter aimlessness of these few paragraphs are brought to you by Morning After Midnight Champagne Brain. Because calling it "hungover" doesn't sound very artistic.



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