Here are the people with whom I would politely decline to trade places today:
David Beckam/frozen-fried-fish-products:
Apparently Becks is shilling for a line of "healthier frozen food products" called GO3. This one almost has me at a loss. He's a good-looking, famous, reasonably well-respected, international superstar. Since when do international superstars (even UK transplants that haven't exactly changed the lives of every man, woman, and child in the US the way they'd have liked) decide to be photographed on a field full of children, holding their own weight in FISH STICKS? Furthermore, who had the bright idea to "gourmet up" the platter of fishmeal with a measley sprig of parsley and half of a wilted-looking lemon??????? And - if he MUST be photographed with a smile on his face while he holds a thousand fish fingers...WHY IS HE WEARING CLOTHES? I'm dumbfounded. And glad I'm not David Beckham today. I'll take sitting in a worn-out chair, in front of a worn-out computer with greasy hair, in my pajamas, hoping the Job o' My Dreams is still just "one day from being posted." Because at least I can chose to order a pizza.
The Bellevue SuperBlock
Amazing strides have been made in the last several years to force Seattle to become High Fashion. I figure this is sort of like trying to turn Paul Schafer into a sex symbol. Incongruent at best. While I've long held that we REI, socks & sandals, jeans-at-a-wedding Seattle locals need some serious exposure to the Wide World of Style, the approach developers have taken is a little reckless. The upscale, Eastside suburb of Bellevue was the lamb led to the couture slaughter. Saks, Hermes, Nieman Marcus, that's just the beginning of the list. BUT, it all happened at once. Multi-use high-rise condos sprung up over night, most of them gestating designer boutiques at street-level. One developer was particularly ambitious: bought several city blocks filled with low-rent strip malls (ooh! and one of the original Matt's Chili Dog joints!!) and planned to expand the Bellevue Fashion Empire to...unimagined heights! It was deemed the SuperBlock. Too bad reality stepped in. Condo sales came to a screeching halt. Banks got cold feet. Investors backed out. Read today that the SuperBlock is up ON the block. For sale for a cool $113 million. Developers asking for 50% down. Buyers and investors are chuckling. NOT looking good for Seattle Fashion.
Um....Runway models for Lauren Conrad
So, I'll get this little admission out of the way before I launch into the rest of my disparaging paragraph: I envy Lauren Conrad's "career" (YES, I use the term loosely). She's famous for nothing, getting opportunities she's hardly qualified for (NO, I don't care that she attended the "Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising..." so did lots of other girls who AREN'T on a lame television show getting undeserved offers thrown at them left and right), she's got great hair, long legs, and...a LOT of media attention. I want that. I really do. HOWEVER: she gets herself a packed house at LA's Fashion week and struts out a model with....a wad of Kleenex on her head. I mean...I would have the good sense not to slap a white faux flower on a girl's head - from any distance, it will look like a cheesy stage prop. Like a handkerchief. Like Bounty. I won't knock LC's own "sense of style," that's up to the greater shopping public....but so far, I'm not impressed with her runway savvy.
And, is it just me, or does this look distinctly like it belongs on the Fredericks of Hollywood website?
They should've had Lauren Conrad's show at the SuperBlock, with David Beckham appearing to hock his fish sticks (because when you think of Seattle, you think of fish?). That would've drawn crowds for all sorts of reasons, and David Beckham could buy the SuperBlock with the change in his back pocket! Everyone wins. Except for that girl with the flower on her head.
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